Faith's Harvest

^{3 "}For by the grace given to me, I tell everyone among you not to think of himself more highly than he should think. Instead, think sensibly, as God has distributed a measure of faith to each one. ⁴ Now as we have many parts in one body, and all the parts do not have the same function, ⁵ in the same way we who are many are one body in Christ and individually members of one another. ⁶ According to the grace given to us, we have different gifts: If prophecy, use it according to the proportion of one’s faith; ⁷ if service, use it in service; if teaching, in teaching; ⁸ if exhorting, in exhortation; giving, with generosity; leading, with diligence; showing mercy, with cheerfulness." Romans 12: 3-8 (CSB)

Faith's Harvest: 365-Day Devotional

I wrote this devotional to motivate people to look deeper into the Word. It is for people whom may have some questions about their faith. What is the point of it all? The book is separated into twelve topics for each month. Each day has a question. I answer each question using what I believe after years of searching God's Word. I use scriptures to back up each of my answers but hope that you will read it for yourself. I hope that this helps you figure some things out in your life.

by Amberly Bannister

     It has been a while since I posted.  I spent last year writing three books, so I have not made the time for blogging.  I published by first book through Newman Spring Publishing.  It was a learning experience.  I learned that it took over double the time to turn it into a book than what it took to write.  I learned that I want to do through a Christian publishing company next time.  I enjoyed the experience, but I learned that I need to fully edit the book before I entrust others to do so.  I found so many editing errors after the book was published.

     I wrote the books mostly from prayer/devotional journals.  Right now, I am editing my second book more thoroughly.  I hope to send it to a publisher this summer.  If anyone has a recommendation of Christian publishers, please, let me know.
     I also officially joined First Baptist Church Atlanta today.  I am looking forward to see how God can use me there.  I have been attending for over a year, but I wanted to make sure it was not just a stage in my life before joining.  

     It is a long drive and don't fully understand why God has chosen them to be my church family, but I love the friends that I have made.  They have been so supportive and true Christian friends that call me on things, but in a loving way.  They have never shown me critizism or attitude.  It is amazing to hear Charles Stanley and Anthony George every Sunday that I am able to attend.  The music is amazing.  I look forward to see how I grow with them and what I can give in return.

Remembering Chloe

³ 

“Blessed are the poor in spirit,

    for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

⁴ 

Blessed are those who mourn,

    for they will be comforted.

⁵ 

Blessed are the meek,

    for they will inherit the earth."

Matthew 5: 3-5

     Those of you that know me know that my dogs have been like my children.  For a single person, we really do love our pets like parents love their children.  There are obviously a difference, but that is where we put our family or parental love.

     My babies, Vader and Chloe.  They are litter mates.  I have had them since they were about six weeks old.  They have never been apart a day in their lives.  But now I must sperate them.
     In July, we discovered that Chloe had a mass on her heart.  Through an x-ray I was able to see that her heart was enlarged and that her lungs were affected.  However, that was part of old age too.  We believe that the mass was malignant because she has lost so much weight in a short amount of time along with other symptoms.  Basically, is was like she had congested heart failure.
     I will not go into the struggle of choosing what is best for my baby over the last few weeks and watching what this has been doing to Vader.  I made my choice out of love.  This is the choice I would make for myself if I was in my final stages of cancer.  I didn't want her see her in pain or watch her struggle anymore.
     The process of clearing the path to the unused pet grave yard was difficult.  Digging the grave was impossible, but I had a wonderful friend help me.  God has been faithful through all this.  I am blessed to of had them both for over 13 years.

Timing

     Sorry it has been so long.  I have had a lot to say.  My attitude has been getting better.  I have transitioned from what I thought my life was going to be like when I got back to a place of acceptance.  I have began making life giving friends that accept me for where I am in my journey.  They are wonderful friends that are encouraging my growth, even if they are unaware of it.
     I do miss my hiking friends.  With my job I cant have a weekend off.  That means for me to get my Sunday, I can never have a Saturday off.  It makes it somewhat challenging to have a social life, but God has a mysterious way of working.  He is networking for me. 
     I am involved a singles community in Atlanta.  I am still praying on joining First Baptist of Atlanta (Charles Stanley's church).  It is an hour from home, so it makes it hard to get there during the week.  I am praying on if God wants me to move to Atlanta.  I have been looking into jobs and home around the Stone Mountain area.  The homes there are just out side the city and cheaper than Cartersville.
     I have been feeling hopeful again.  My life is not what I wanted or close to what I expected, but God is changing my perspective.  He is showing me a way to use all of my past for my future.  A couple of weeks ago I finished my first book.  I am still struggling on finding the right publisher for me to collaborate with to make it better.  I am a good way into my second book.  Then, I have about five more books that I am thinking about. Before you ask, no it is not about my time in Bolivia.  I am still working through some things and when I am done, then I will probably write about my time there.  That is if God wants.  If not, then it will stay in my heart forever.

To everything there is a season,
A time for every purpose under heaven:

² 

A time to be born,
And a time to die;
A time to plant,
And a time to pluck what is planted;

³ 

A time to kill,
And a time to heal;
A time to break down,
And a time to build up;

⁴ 

A time to weep,
And a time to laugh;
A time to mourn,
And a time to dance;

⁵ 

A time to cast away stones,
And a time to gather stones;
A time to embrace,
And a time to refrain from embracing;

⁶ 

A time to gain,
And a time to lose;
A time to keep,
And a time to throw away;

⁷ 

A time to tear,
And a time to sew;
A time to keep silence,
And a time to speak;

⁸ 

A time to love,
And a time to hate;
A time of war,
And a time of peace.

Ecclesiates 3: 1-8

Revelation

^{25 "}Now to Him who is able to establish you according to my gospel and the preaching of Jesus Christ, according to the revelation of the mystery kept secret since the world began ²⁶ but now made manifest, and by the prophetic Scriptures made known to all nations, according to the commandment of the everlasting God, for obedience to the faith"

Romans 16:24-26

     Sometimes you have to get away from all the distractions of life.  I do at least.  I have what is called a diplomat personality.  I am right in the middle if the introvert and extrovert, along with type A.  I get all the extravert part at work.  However, since returning from Bolivia, I have not found sufficient alone time.  I have found that this has been pushing me hard.
     I needed to hear God's voice.  Like always, I expected a big revelation.  God knows me better.  He knew I needed something different.  I know who I am in Him.  I get lost sometime.  I am not sure exactly when, but I have been wandering for too long.  I needed to find purpose again.  I am tired of just working (at work, at home, pleasing others, and whatnot).
     I did not get that big "WOW"  moment.  Instead, I had the Holy Spirit whispering ever so gently in my ear.  Ever since Bolivia, I have not felt good enough, accepted, or connecting to anyone.  This has put a lot of self-doubt in me.  I have been working through all this for several months.  I have had a few friends that I opened up to completely, to help guide me and support me.

A couple of weeks ago, I left my last report on a cliff-hanger.  The reason why was because I didn't want to speak in case I was building something up in my head to have no results.  I am happy to say, at least in this moment, that I am walking out on faith in a way that I never have before.  I am going to listen intently to the Holy Spirit's guidance and insight.
     I have decided to try publishing.  I have written in prayer journals ever since I was about 21.  I started writing this blog to help communicate while I was on the mission field.  What I have discovered is that I have been able to work out things going on inside me best while making myself vulnerable in writing it out.  I have been really encouraged at First Baptist Church of Atlanta because they don't know me well enough to know that I write, yet every week they tell me how much they like my perspective and insight.  Soon, I will tell them how much they have helped me.  
  I may not become successful as a writer, but I believe that this is my way of being a true missionary on my path to serve God.  This may be a way for me to reach nations.  Time will tell.  It may be my path for right now and God may change my course yet again later on.  I am chosing to embrace it all.  I hope you enjoy the ride.  I have no connections to any publishers, so if you know of any, please, contact me via email, text, facebook, or linkedin.

Empowerment

¹⁷ For the law was given through Moses; grace and truth came through Jesus Christ. ¹⁸ No one has ever seen God, but the one and only Son, who is himself God and^[a] is in closest relationship with the Father, has made him known.

John 1:17-18

     I have been wandering in the desert (so to speak) too long.  I have a strong personality that is called a bulldozer or lion personality.  I also care about people, so I have struggled with a balance all my life.  The struggle has led me to give up power or decisions for my life to others in whom I believed knew better.  This has been a mistake in most cases because I lose a part of myself every time.
     While in Bolivia is was small things and because I was not an independent missionary and a rule follower I went along with some things that I felt were suffocating me. I would probably of done the same thing, but I should have spoken up when and why I was not happy with certain things instead of trying to not rick the boat.  Instead, I tried to keep things to myself and getting lost. 

     I lost my direction, so when my family needed me to come home to help them out after my grandfather's death I said I would.  It was the right choice, but again I left my decisions to others.  It has made me angry and it made it more difficult to adjust back to being in the States.   However, I recognized the symptoms and decided with the new year that I was going to make changes.
     When I returned I said I was going to spend the next year on my relationship with GOD.  I have done that.  It  has been a difficult journey and I am still in the middle, but I am seeing the light and peace again.  My joy is coming back by taking control over my life again.  It is only small things like selling my older car to get a better fuel and dog age appropriate car.  I am taking control of where I believe God is leading me for my future.  It is still a fog, but it is starting to clear.  I am letting a hand full of people really into my life and they have permission to tell me things that could hurt me because I trust that they really love me and want only the best for me.  I have also changed churches.  This has been a surprise for me because I love my home church, but I need to be around strong Christian singles that understand the struggles that I face in this society.
     In a couple of weeks, I am taking a new step out into my journey.  One that I am really excited about and have never allowed myself to do before.  I expect things to change after this, but even if they do not I know this is what God needs me to do for OUR relationship.

Four Seasons

Beyond all question, the mystery from which true godliness springs is great: He appeared in the flesh, was vindicated by the Spirit, was seen by angels, was preached among the nations, was believed on in the world, was taken up in glory.

1 Timothy 3:16

     When I was in Bolivia, the number one thing I missed (besides friends, family, and my dogs) was Fall.  I missed having fours season, no matter how much I loved the "perfect" and dependable weather of Bolivia.  However, now that I am back I am realizing that there is a very real cost for such beauty.   I have come home to the coldest winter that Georgia has had since before my birth. 
     November, I accepted I was going to be cold until I adjusted.  That was fine.  I had Thanksgiving with my family.  I got to cook a feast for my family and I loved it.  December rolled around and I realized, I was not going to adapt.  I had to learn how to endure.  Now it is January.  A new year and we have only had three days above freezing.  I have to ask myself, why did I come home.  (This is meant to be funny, not sad).  Then, I have to remind myself that God sent me back.  I needed to be here for whatever purpose He has chosen.  

      I have not figured it all out, but I am trying to be a trooper.  I am searching for a home.  I am looking into getting a new car.  I am opening up and relying on good friends unlike ever before.  I am looking forward and now behind.  I am praying over going to India with dear friends as they pass through Texas on their way home from Bolivia.  Or going to Thailand to check out a mission involving Human Trafficing Prevention.  It has been a passion of mine since I realized how horrible women are treated throughout the entire world.
     I am still totally clueless where my future lies.  The fog is getting clearer.  I am enjoying my job.  I wish I knew exactly where my path was leading me, but God knows that I will run ahead like a puppy if He gave me any slack.  I chose to trust Him in the unknown.